There are three primary publications in the 21st Century Relationships Series. Book 1: Intrapersonal Intelligence (AI), Book 2: Interpersonal Intelligence (EI), and Book 3: Parental Intelligence (PI). Other books in the series are listed below.
Title: Reading, Riting, Rithmetic, & Relationships
Subtitle: An argument for making relationship education a societal priority.
Explanation and Description: The biggest problem in America, indeed the world, is a lack of relationship education. Relationship education is not a value in our society but if it were our country and the world would be a better place. Here is an example. In a February 1990 interview Barbara Walters asked Donald Trump, “What’s the best piece of advice you’ve given your children?” He replied, “Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell, and advertise.” Not a mention of relationships. Quote source: ABC News Productions, Inc. (2009). 25 on 20/20. Barbara Walters, 25 Years of Ground-Breaking Interviews. We have made great strides in technology, exploring outer space, neurology, and historically, but our relationship knowledge is woeful as evidenced by the fact that America is consistently barely in the top twenty in The World Happiness Report, and we have one of the highest divorce rates in the world.
A timely example of how relationship knowledge is sorely lacking in our society is the current 2023/2024 debate over Roe vs. Wade which questions if abortions should be allowed. Research shows that only a small percentage of women, possibly as low as 20%, who seek abortions had a planned pregnancy and now seek an abortion for medical reasons or had non-consensual sex, such as rape. The other 80% chose to have consensual sex. There is a myriad of ways to have safe, consensual sex that is fun and enjoyable without getting pregnant. Safe, consensual sex that is fun and enjoyable can be had without even having sexual intercourse. Don’t get pregnant, get education. Both the man and the woman are equally responsible. According to the Guttmacher Institute, abortions were the highest ever in 2023 with over 1 million performed.
A persons RQ (Relationship Quotient), has little to do with their intelligence, chronological age, or their IQ (Intelligence Quotient). Someone can be 50 years old and have an IQ of 140 but have an RQ of 40. Notable examples are Albert Einstein and Frank Lloyd Wright. Both contributed significantly to science and architecture but failed with their significant relationships. They had a high IQ but a low RQ. Included are suggestions on how individuals and organizations can help make relationship education a societal priority. People will also be able offer their own suggestions on the website.
www.readingritingrithmeticandrelationships.com
Title: What is Love?
Subtitle: A look at love’s ambiguous definition.
Explanation and Description: Just because you feel love for someone doesn’t mean they feel your love or even have the same definition of love that you have. Is love a thought, a feeling, or an action? Although it is one of our strongest basic needs and one of the most often used words in our vocabulary, we do not have a universal definition for the word love. A twelve-year research study has discovered over 2,000 definitions for the word love and more than 1,000 of those come from credible relationship educators and scholars. We actually have more words in the English language describing water than we do for love. Water can be rivers, streams, oceans, tributaries, ponds, seas, lakes, rain, sprinkle, reservoirs, puddles, channel, trench, canal, waterway, aqueduct, mist, condensation, distillation, fog, humidity, aqua, drink, ice, steam, saliva, tears, waterfalls, flood, and H2O. These are all synonyms for different types of water. We don’t have universal definitions for different types of love that we all agree upon and understand although love is just as important to our existence as water.
What love means is explored in this publication. You can submit your suggestions online as we develop a new dictionary of love with brand new words and precise definitions by clicking on the New Dictionary of Love tab. A definition of unconditional love is offered in this publication and in 21st Century Relationships that works in all relationships.
www.newdictionaryoflove.com
Title: aMErica: A Yoked Nation
Subtitle: We are a nation yoked to getting what we want and although our culture may get us what we want, the majority of the time it produces unhealthy relationships.
Explanation and Description: Scholars, researchers, and evidence identifies our culture as: an appearance culture, an individualistic culture, a disposable culture, a conflict-as-opportunity culture, an argument culture, a control society, even a civilization of war and destruction. All of these characteristics have one common denominator. They are me focused. Relationships are a we situation.
One of the best examples of aMErica is the 2020/21/22 corona virus pandemic. Health experts implored people to wear masks, maintain six feet of social distancing, and avoid large gatherings. Very few people actually did that. In fact, many people protested, sometimes with weapons, claiming it was a violation of their liberty. The guidelines prevent spreading the virus to others and people can be asymptomatic, meaning they can have the virus, not know it or not have any symptoms, and still spread it to others. Not a difficult concept to understand. Caring about others is non-existent while focusing on oneself takes precedence. At the 2022 college football championship game there were 100,000 fans in attendance and very few wore masks. Besides not wearing a mask, these people were not wearing the sign around their neck that says, “I don’t care if I infect other people with a deadly virus, I’m not following the safety guidelines.” The result? aMErica has more corona virus deaths than any other country. As of March 12th, 2022, the number of cases was over 79 million (17% of the cases in the world) and the number of deaths was over 946,000 and still climbing. 1 in 500 Americans have died from coronavirus since the nation’s first reported infection. On January 4th, 2022, the U.S. set a single-day global record of 1,082,549 cases.
The U.S. is 4% of the world’s population but has over 16% of Covid deaths worldwide. This is further evidence of the alarmingly low empathy skills of the American people and the lack of intrapersonal relationship knowledge. People refuse, or do not know how to take care of themselves to strengthen their natural immune system. In several cities there were even mask-burning protests where parents allowed their children to put masks in a fire which is an excellent example of how parents teach their children low empathy skills.
Americans love drugs, both legal and illegal. The average American takes four prescription drugs a day and 90% of Americans take multiple over-the-counter drugs daily. The U.S. is not just a nation yoked to getting what it wants, it is yoked to drugs. Drugs, in large part, caused the virus to be so deadly. Every foreign substance we put in our bodies, whether it’s legal or illegal drugs, alcohol, or marijuana, weakens our natural immune system’s ability to ward off illnesses such as Covid. America is only one of two countries that allow drug manufacturers to advertise their products, and doctors who prescribe the medications often make millions from the manufacturers. When you also consider that America is one of the most obese countries in the world it is not difficult to see how easily the virus spread. What is needed is intrapersonal relationship education, not more drugs, so people can learn how to take care of themselves and be healthy. Education is preventive, drugs are prescriptive. If we get healthy, we do not need drugs. More drugs, such as additional vaccines and booster shots, may solve the immediate problem of the symptoms of the virus but they contribute significantly to poor health in the future. Wouldn’t it make more sense to mandate that people get healthy instead of mandating drugs, drugs, and more drugs? The effectiveness of the vaccines is even in question. Puerto Rico, for example, has close to an 80% vaccination rate yet had an explosion of covid cases.
Children are punished, beaten and molested; relationships are destroyed; wars are fought; people are even killed to get what we want. It is not necessary to kill to get what we want, in fact, it’s barbaric and shows that as a country, we have a very low RQ (Relationship Quotient) After all, getting what we want is the American dream, isn’t it? Healthy relationships are primarily about what we give, not what we get. As Winston Churchill observed, “We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.” There is a huge difference between getting our basic needs met and getting what we want. The former is necessary; the latter can be toxic if it is not constructive and empathetic. Being yoked to getting what we want is like wetting the bed; we’re supposed to outgrow it.
In regard to relationships, the aMErican dream has become a nightmare, and the primary reason is a lack of relationship education.
Title: Myths & Truths of Relationships
Subtitle: Have some fun while getting an indication of your RQ (Relationship Quotient).
Explanation and Description: Answer 285 questions to test your relationship knowledge and then compare your answers to what the experts say. Yes, learning can be fun. Nineteen categories include: Myths & Truths of (in alphabetical order): Anger, Choosing a Partner, Conflict, Displays of Affection, Empathy, Kissing, Love, Marriage and Pair Bonding, Millennials, Monogamy and Fidelity, Narcissism, Parenting, Reading People Using Birth Order Indicators, Reading People Using Gender Differences Indicators, Reading People Using Handwriting Analysis Indicators, Reading People Using Verbal & Non-Verbal Indicators, Relationship Satisfaction, and Sex.
www.mythsandtruthsofrelationships.com
Title: The EPA of Relationships
Subtitle: Three of the most valuable relationship skills: Empathy, Power, and Anger.
Explanation and Description: Empathy skills, understanding and using your need for power in a healthy way, and managing and expressing your anger appropriately are essential for satisfying and fulfilling relationships. Assessments are provided so you can determine your skill level in all three areas.
These three skills are also presented in three publications in the 21st Century Relationships series.
www.theepaofrelationships.com
Title: Who am I?
Subtitle: Do you think you know yourself? Research says no.
Explanation and Description: We have two types of relationships in our lives, the relationships we have with others and the relationship we have with ourselves, our Interpersonal Intelligence (our EI), and our Intrapersonal Intelligence (our AI). Answer sixty questions to give you an initial indication of your AI – how well you know yourself. Forty of these questions are presented in Book one of 21st Century Relationships, Intrapersonal Intelligence (AI).
www.doiknowwhoiam.com
Title: Your Relationship Quotient
Subtitle: How are your relationship skills?
Explanation and Description: Take three assessments to determine your AI, EI, and PI (Intrapersonal Intelligence, Interpersonal Intelligence, and Parental Intelligence). The individual scores will give you an indication of your skills in those particular areas. The combined score will give you an indication of your overall relationship knowledge – your RQ (Relationship Quotient).
www. yourrelationshipquotient.com
Title: My Born Identity
Subtitle: There’s nothing more important in this world than kids.
Explanation and Description: The author’s memoir and reasons for researching the subject of relationships for over thirty years.
www.mybornidentity.com